On Human Freedom & Friendship
On a Black Metal forum that I visit there is an ‘Ask J. M. Verville’ thread. Here is one of the better questions and my response:
electricprophet said:
Dear, J. M. Verville
What are your thoughts about freedom, and do you think that people will ever be truly free to live their lives as they choose ?
First: all people are born free. I subscribe to the Sartre school of thought that we are damned to be free. the only thing that governs us are physical laws.
Observe young children: they have no concept of law. They are selfish. They go where they want and do what they want. It is possible for people to be liberated as such and become what Ernst Junger refers to as an anarch, a person who lives within society yet ignores the laws and does as they please and as their heart.
There are some people who do amazing things that are even against their instincts — people who commit martyrdom for a losing cause; people who take vows of celibacy; people who go on hunger strike; hell, people who commit suicide.
However, you will see that there are many people who aren’t free.
Even the most individualistic person will sometimes put on a suit and tie and go to work.
You have met the political idealists who are forced to do all manner of things against their ideals.
And more than that: everyone values beauty even though it is empty and fleeting.
An overweight man with a cleft lip yet who is a stunning musician, a veritable poet; a master conversationalist; a man of high virtues who shares 95% in common with a pretty girl….
Vs.
A very attractive man with good money. He has no real artistic quality, and he can only discuss petty things because he has half the brain of the overweight man; he shares about 15% in common with a pretty girl…
Well, the result is clear in 99 out of 100 situations:
Cleft lip is her best friend and will attend the pretty girl’s wedding to the attractive man.
This also speaks to freedom.
We do not have the ability to follow even our most basic ideals — even ones that would be celebrated, e.g. “falling in love because you really love the person inside.” If you did that everyone would think you had a heart of gold and were a Saint… But something inside of us is so repulsed by what we perceive as physically unattractive that this won’t happen…
And to expand further: there have been many times in history and in many cultures where obesity, even for women, was considered beautiful, meaning that concepts of beauty are entirely relative.
We cannot even overcome relative, arbitrary standards that society imposes upon us.
So, I summarize:
Human freedom in fact is only limited by laws of nature, but due to the wiring of the majority of humans many of us live as slaves.
Slaves to society, slaves to other’s perception.
Lao-tzu said, “If you value another’s opinion over your own, you become their slave.”
In a bizarre sense we have all become slaves.
But I do not hold it against anyone. They cannot help it.
That is why I jog.
I jog because when I am thinner I can get girls easier, because at the end of the day few people are willing to care about what is inside of you until they found what is on the outside of you to be acceptable.
The only people who will care about the inside[ before they care about the outside are your friends and family, and in this strange sense it is in our chosen friendships that we are most free.
We can tell our friends anything, and most people do not pick their friends based on appearances.
Our friends are the greatest apparition of our freedom.
I think you could best know a man through knowing who is friends are, and you will see what sort of person they are. Actions speak louder than words, and in this sense, your friends speak highest about what you freely choose and freely do that is not so jaded by the social norms imposed on us.
Even pretty girl and handsome men have ugly friends, though seldom will they have unattractive lovers.